I came out of the forest to find me. Left my excess baggage behind. Don’t really care much...don’t need it anymore. I earned it!
Here’s what I found out :You learn more from the things that don't work out, then the Things that do.
So how does this work ? Perseverance .And sometimes perseverance in the face of great adversity. So it ends up being, you have to protect what is it in you that you need for yourself in order the became that someone you need to be. And that takes discipline, takes this degree of perseverance that ultimately is not the measure of who you are as person, but its a measure of what you are as a human being. And its hard. Because their is nothing greater then defining yourself by your qualities and values as a human being. And that’s where it gets tough.
Understanding our past determines actively our ability to understand the present.
So how do we sift truth from belief, how do we write our own history, both personally or socially?. And that is my quest.
Its new years eve and im sitting here at home, didn’t feel like going anywhere. But felt this real need to write this down.
the moment thought realises what it is doing to itself – what we are doing to ourselves – it has begun really to learn", and who would disagree? But what prevents or delays this moment of truth? Why, if it is all so simple, if it is all just a matter of realising, once and for all, what one is doing, does one not realise?
Imitation without question is easier than discovery, a comfort zone ,emptiness, the truth takes longer to discover.
Surely we have taken enough time to discover what we are. We are conditioned human beings. We have discovered this fact about ourselves after listening to those one or two others who have carefully pointed it out to us, and perhaps also by experimenting a little with it for ourselves. At the end of it we may have discovered the truth - perhaps a truth discovered many times over - that we are conditioned human beings. And yet somehow we remain essentially conditioned, still caught up in our habits, our reactions and preoccupations, our prejudices and our fears, still tied to a seemingly innate bundle of human sorrows. So having taken the time and the trouble to discover all this about ourselves, what actual good has this discovery done? If, at the end of it, we are left merely with the discovery that we are conditioned and yet continue in more or less the same pattern as before, have we actually discovered anything at all of any practical use? Therefore I question whether it takes time to discover what we are. I also question whether it is a complicated process - I don't say it is simple, but I question the complication of it - because I think time and complication are necessary only when we want to avoid what we are. Then self-discovery and self-knowledge can become a lifetime's work, at the end of which we are still conditioned human beings.
Because The conditioning is the habit, taught to us as children, to shift our attention from the perception of our senses to what our memory thinks about the perception of our senses and to accept the thoughts as truth instead of the perceptions.
But if i want to act a lil as the devils advocate i can say,
Yes, sir, conditioning is the root cause - we are not saying otherwise - so there is no disagreement between us. But conditioning itself has no cause. That's the point. It may have an historical cause - because of something that happened when I was three years old, for example - but even the tracing back to find the various historical causes doesn't end conditioning. On the contrary, the very act of tracing back may be a conditioned reflex which always looks to the past for its answers.
So if conditioning has no cause, if fear has no cause, then there is only this: there is only fear. The moment we start to say, 'Well the cause of fear is this, that or the other,' then fear has already taken hold of the problem and is attempting to shape it in its own limited terms, which is in the act of providing an explanation for fear. There is no explanation for fear. So you are stuck with fear. Now will you accept that? Or you already are moving away when you only accept it as an idea. Or you resist it, say, 'What rot - fear has a cause,' and then you continue to live in fear because still you haven't found the cause. So you are forever caught in time, caught in the hope or in the belief or the in certainty of finding a cause for fear. Whereas it has no cause.
And we need to discuss all this because it is not a simple affair. Fear lies in every word we use, in the language we have inherited, which again is all part of our conditioning. What matters is our approach to the problem of fear. If you say, 'Fear has a cause,' then show me the cause and it is over and done with. But no-one has ever done this. Instead they have presented their theory or their opinion about it which is then ready to fight the next man's theory or opinion about it.
So where do we stand? Sometimes i wonder if I’ve lost my mind, or if i have finally found it.
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