i don't want to talk about it ever again

the change in my life is unsettling,
but i think i'm getting used to it after all these years.
i hope, at least.
I'm sorry that I force so many things to happen.
I don't think I've ever stopped
But maybe it's fate that I force things.
Maybe, if I didn't, none of this would have happened
i'm sorry i'm not as good as i once was.
i'm sorry that you got to know me and realized
how i really was.
i'm sorry how i really am.
i'm sorry i let you in.
i'm sorry i let you go.
i'm sorry for what i said.
i'm sorry for what i will say.
i'm sorry for how long i kept quiet.
i'm sorry for never letting them in.
i'm sorry for breaking those promises.
i'm sorry for not being real.
i'm sorry you think i don't care.
i'm sorry for keeping your secret.
i'm sorry i wasn't there when you needed me the most.

i'm sorry for complaining