Sunday, June 13, 2010
I’ll always love you. With every last piece of my broken heart
It’s amazing. People grow so used to the dark, they start to like it. The curtains blocking out the light are comforting to them. The dark makes them happy. But really it’s just an illusion. When the curtains are gone, and everything’s light, you see things you never even knew where there, and you really start to appreciate them. Of course, they were there before, but you never took the time to look
Why cant you just love me, like I love you? I know, you’ve given me a million chances to change my ways , but i've been stuburn.But I need you back, more than I need anything right now.
I would like to think each one of us has one moment in our life, where we feel completely perfect. Like everything’s finally fit together right. Yeah, that would be nice.
It doesn’t matter how many times you tell me its gonna be okay, I just cant listen anymore, because you cant give me the one thing I want more than anything in the world. You cant give me you. So no, its not gonna be okay.
You made me happy, we were happy. But right now I’m stuck in this situation where I don’t know whether to completely ignore you and try to forget you, or to stick around and be there for you, just to prove I love you a billion times more than she does.
And If someone asks me who I see my future with, I picture it with somebody who doesn’t exist. I mean, its you, but it’s a you that actually loves me back.
But i can just hear the words in your mibd if you actually read this..."You gotta start listening to your brain once in a while if you want to save your heart."
Sometimes, when you love someone so much, not even the truth can change it.
But if you wonder why I don’t talk to you anymore, and please believe me when I say it’s not that I don’t want to, its just that everything I want to say, I cant tell you anymore.
And i cant help but to think that every guy is going to love a girl who will never love them back. And as he sits there crying because she will never want him, he doesn’t realise that there’s a girl across the world thinking of him. A girl who would give anything to see her smile, make her laugh, or kiss her in the rain. A boy who would never make him cry because she doesn’t want him. But he will forever be chasing the girl who will never love him, instead of giving his heart to the one who deserves it.
You choose whether or not you open your heart to love. And you know what I think? I think you do love me. Or you could love me. But you're just too stubborn and scared to admit it because the last time you really gave your heart to someone, it got broken. And I get that. I've been there. But somewhere along the line, you gave up on the idea that you deserve to feel this way again
And its just that There’s just something about you that I’ve always been scared to lose because I know I won’t find it in anybody else.
You said you never meant to hurt me, but that doesn’t make it right. You said you
were wrong and apologised way too many times but that doesn’t make it okay.
So listen, when I say it’s alright, its not. When you see the tears falling from my eyes, that means I’m not okay, I’m not that strong but I guess I should have seen it coming all along.
But i know that it will eventually change one day. It happens to everyone as they grow up...you find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that the people you've known forever don't see things the way you do. And so you keep the memories, but you find yourself moving on.
But untill then...Nobody could hurt me like I knew he could hurt me. But there’s no-one in this world I want more.